How I Got Your Mother
by pinkfreak805
Summary: Harry sits down his three teenage children to tell them the tale of how he and Ginny got together. Humor, sadness, romance, drama, family, friends. Probably not what you're expecting.
1. Chapter 1

**AN: So I've been watching **_**"How I Met Your Mother"**_** rather obsessively lately, and I thought it'd be fun to take the same idea and do it Harry Potter style. The difference though is that It'd be boring to tell how Harry and Ginny met, you all already know that story, you read the books. Instead this is how they got married. How they got back together, again. **

** This wont follow all the things Rowling said though, but it mostly does. Same pairings and children any ways. So I hope you enjoy my take on what might possibly could have happened to Harry after _"The Flaw in the Plan"_ and before the Epilogue. Enjoy!**

**Chapter 1: How I Got Your Mother**

"That was really great mum!" Lilly said, having just finished her first helping of dinner. Her brothers James and Albus were just starting their thirds.

"Thanks dear. It'll be nice when you three are out again and I can cook less." Ginny smiled, finishing off her own plate.

"Less? Seems like we cook more when the kids are in school." I said. "We have guests over almost every week."

"I guess you're right." Ginny said as she stared at our oldest son, James, with longing in her eyes. Here he was about to start his very last year at Hogwarts. It was so hard to believe.

She looked at me, and in that moment when her sad brown eyes meet mine I knew what she was thinking. How could he be so grown up?

"I think I'll go for a walk," She said, then rose from the table. The same table we'd had since we married, so very long ago.

"Could I join you?" I asked, rising as well.

She just nodded, tucking her seat into its place. "Any chance of you three clearing the table?"

Lilly sighed an "Alright" while the boys nodded and continued to stuff their faces.

...

It was a quiet evening with a relaxing breeze. Summer was ending and the leaves were beginning to hint orange and brown.

"I'm so glade we moved here," Ginny sighed dreamily. "This was the perfect place to raise the kids."

I nodded. "One of our best decisions." We headed down the same lane we have lived on for almost twenty years. I wondered if my parents had taken walks down this same street when they had lived here forty years before. Had Godric's Hollow been any different then?

"I can't believe how grown up they've gotten." Ginny sighed. "Seems like only yesterday I was pregnant for the first time and we were just moving in."

"I know what you mean."

"Now James is an adult and he wont be ours any more." Ginny sounded close to tears.

"Don't say that." I put a hand around her waist. "He'll always be ours, no matter what."

"But it wont be the same."

"You're right. But that's the way it's supposed to be."

Ginny sighed again. "It still hurts."

"I know love." I stopped and pulled her into a warm hug. "But some day, likely not too far off, he'll have children of his own. Then you'll be too busy spoiling your grandchildren to think of how old he's grown."

Ginny chuckled. "He really could use a good girl to settle him down."

We began walking again. There was peaceful silence for a few blocks until a thought struck me. "You know I think they're old enough to know how we got together."

"They already do." Ginny said. "We've told them plenty of times about you being best friends with Ron and such."

"No, I mean the full story."

Ginny considered this."Oh, well that's a very long story."

"I know, but don't you think they ought to know? We should pass it down. Let the tale live on."

"I suppose." Ginny agreed. "But only if you let me edit while you tell it."

"Why?"

"There are some things I'd rather our children didn't know."

Some of our less virtuous moments came to mind. "Oh, yes you're probably right. Tonight then?"

Ginny nodded. "That's probably best, they are leaving next week."

…...

"What's going on?" James asked. The kids sat in the parlor on the couch across from us. Ginny and I sat on a sofa.

"I'm going to tell you how your mother and I got together."

"Oh!" Lilly clapped her hands together in enthusiasm. James on the other hand looked skeptical, Albus indifferent.

"Is this punishment or something?" James wanted to know. Ginny and I laughed.

"You might think so by the end." Ginny said through a giggle. "I'm going to straighten up the kitchen while your father begins." She left with a smile and shook her head anticipating what was to come.

"Well, any ways," I sat up straighter, "It all started way back in 2003."

**AN: And thus the saga begins... Thanks for reading, and if you could, please review!**


	2. Chapter 2

****AN: From now on when Harry is narrating I'm not putting quotation marks. But I will when Ginny or one of the kids speaks, or they ask Harry a question or something.****

**Chapter 2: The First Time**

I can still remember that day clearly, how exhausted I was, how dreary it was outside.

"I'd like to see Mr. Jenson, if it's at all possible." Back then Marvin Jenson was the head of the Department of Magical Games and Sports.

"He isn't in yet, but his morning is open, if you wouldn't mind waiting for him." I wasn't in the mood, but agreed to wait in his office.

When I opened the door there was Ginny, looking beautiful and startled as she unbuttoned her jacket.

But that's not really when everything started.

It really started the day we met.

…

"Do you kids know when that was?" I asked, not sure if we'd ever told them.

"Um, the summer after your first year when uncle Ron invited you to stay at the Burrow?" Al guessed.

"Not quite," Ginny spoke up from the kitchen. "Let's go back a year."

…

It was September first, nineteen ninety one. I was just a frightened kid, all alone, with no idea how to get to platform nine and three-quarters.

And then I heard her, your grandmother.

I heard her say "muggle", and I turned to see a load of red heads.

I could barely see your mother hidden behind your gran and brothers.

The very first thing I heard her say was "Platform nine and three-quarters".

But as you know, it was years before we were even close to being friends. I was a stupid boy, and just thought of her as my best friend's mate for about five years.

…

"What changed?" Lilly wondered.

"He finally got his head out of his... Well, he finally wised up." Ginny said. I chuckled.

"I'm not really sure what changed." I admitted. "But we starting spending more time together over the summer before my sixth year, and then I spent that whole year thinking about her like crazy."

"He took forever to make a move." Ginny sighed and then plopped down next to me again. "I mean I was single for weeks, dropping him hints every chance I got, but he wouldn't do anything."

"Sorry." I laughed more. "I was scared that you'd say no-or Ron would kill me."

The children looked surprised that their uncle would ever harm me.

"So you decided not to ask me at all." Ginny smiled, relishing the memory. "Instead you just planted one on me."

"What?" The kids all gasped together as we laughed.

"It's true." I nodded, still laughing. "And right in front of the entire Gryffindor house."

"What?" They looked at each other in horrific surprise.

"It was after a quidditch game. I had to sit it out because of detention."

"Wait!" James cut in. "You were in detention? Why?"

"Uh.." I hesitated, looking at Ginny, knowing that was the sort of thing she wouldn't want the kids to know. I really didn't either.

"It doesn't matter," she said leaving no room for argument.

James looked full of questions, but I went on. "Anyways, it was the last game of the year, and would be the difference between us winning and loosing the Quidditch cup. I ran up to the common room eager to see if we'd won. I burst in to a scene of celebration, and Ron tells me we _had_ won. Then I see Ginny coming over to give me a hug-"

"I wanted to do a lot more than hug you," Ginny said. The kids didn't miss the implications of their mother's comment, and it was evident on their faces.

"Well the point is you hugged me," I continued. "And then I just kissed her, without even thinking."

"It was long over due." Ginny sighed. The kids looked at each other, uncomfortable with the image of their parents kissing thrust into their minds.

"And that's how we got together the first time."

"It was short lived." Ginny shook her head. "He had to break my heart less than two months later."

"I really didn't want to." I said more for Ginny's benefit than the kids'. For some reason I felt like I had to convince her all over again. "It was horrible for me too."

"Why did you it then?" Al asked.

"The war." I answered. "It wasn't safe for her, where I was going, what I was doing. I was afraid Voldemort would use her to get to me or something horrid. It sounds strange now, twenty years later, but back then I wasn't even sure that I'd live through the war. I never imagined I could have a future with Ginny."

"But you did. You got back together after the war?" Lilly asked.

I nodded. "But it wasn't as quick as you think."

**AN: Thanks for reading, please review!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3: The Second Time**

Kids, it's easy to imagine that as soon as Voldemort was defeated the world went back to normal. But that just wasn't so.

You never got to meet your uncle Fred, but he was a wonderful person. Very funny, like your uncle George. He always knew how to lighten a mood, always ready to make people laugh.

When he died, the family was devastated.

Yes, I still saw your mother, but she wasn't ready to be in a relationship. And really, I wasn't either. But I did still love her.

It wasn't until after Fred's funeral that I approached her again and tried to resume our relationship.

…

It was a miserably hot summer's day and the funeral was packed. Fred was so loved by everyone.

Your grandmother asked me to sit by Uncle Ron even though I wasn't really a part of the family yet.

I kept glancing at your mother the entire time. She even looked beautiful then with her eyes red, and cheeks tear streaked.

When it was finally over, everyone lingered to share their sorrows, except Ginny. When I finally spotted her she was hunched over in her chair, clutching her sides with a far off look.

"Can I sit here?"

She looked up and nodded without showing any change in emotion.

"Ginny." It was hard to begin. I put my hand to one of hers. "I'm so sorry." I had prepared this whole speech, but she put a hand to my lips before I could continue.

"Harry, please don't." Her brown eyes filled with tears. "Just-just hold me and shut up."

I wrapped her in my arms and we sat there for a while as she cried onto my sleeve.

For the next couple weeks we hardly spoke. To sit together, hold hands, yet barely share a few words: that was all the consolation we needed.

But then Ginny got better.

One morning I was at the Burrow, in the back yard all alone, sitting on a benches. She was so quiet, I didn't hear her come up, but then she was sitting beside me. She turned towards me, and I could see her eyes were filled with anguish.

"Harry, I've been terribly selfish," She said.

"What-"

"Let me speak. Please. I've been using you for comfort when you want so much more. It isn't fair."

"I don't care," I told her. "Really, I can just be comfort if that's what you want. I'll just be your friend if that's what you want. I'll do whatever you want."

"That's sweet, Harry." She took my hand. "But I don't want to just be friends, I never have. I want to be so much more. But I don't know if I can right now."

How right she was, but the words were disregarded as soon as they were uttered.

"That's alright." I stroked the side of her cheek. "I'll wait twenty years if I have to."

"You're too good for me."

"Not possible."

"I think I'm going to kiss you now."

"I think I'll kiss you first," I said then I kissed her.

I felt happier than I had in a year. When we parted, Ginny was smiling for the first time that summer.

"Now, you have to tell me what you've been doing all year," she said with sternness, yet a smile.

So I did. I told her everything.

You kids know most of it too now, but back then only Uncle Ron, Aunt Hermione, and I knew. So I told your mother about everything she had missed during the Battle at Hogwarts and after.

Things really got better then, but some days were harder than others. We could be together and happy most days, but on others Ginny was too sad to speak.

And the death of Voldemort wasn't the end. There were still death eaters out there with crazy vendettas. I had to help to put them away.

We were just two kids trying to stay together at that time, but we were not ready and not really sure what our relationship meant.

We had no idea how long this bubble would last.

…

The beginning of the end was when I decided to get my own flat. I never knew what this would lead to. If I had known, I would've waited until Ginny had already left for Hogwarts. But I didn't know. I had no idea.

You see, I didn't really have a home. I'd grown up with my uncle and aunt, but they moved, and that house was now occupied by strangers. I'd inherited Number Twelve, Grimmauld Place from my god-father, but it wasn't secure for me to live in at the time.

The Burrow was the only place that truly felt like home, but I couldn't stay there. Your grandmother didn't want me to move out, but I knew I had to. It was time to move on. So I began looking for my own flat.

Ginny helped and we found a place. It was small but I didn't have many possessions.

…

"I just want to cut in here," Ginny said. She gave our children a very stern look. "None of you should be having, or should ever have, sex while still in school."

The children gaped in shock of her blunt honesty.

"She's right," I said with stern conviction.

The kids exchanged frightened looks.

"Did you two...?" James looked between Ginny and me.

"Go on, dear," Ginny said. The statement was directed at me.

…

So there I was, a new auror, in my new flat. I felt so grown up. But I wasn't truly happy. Sure, I was happy when I was with your mother, but things were still tough. I was exhausted from chasing death eaters all day, and it was terrible that your mother was so unhappy. I hated seeing her like that.

I tried to cheer her up when I could, but what I should've realized is that you can't make someone heal faster. Healing takes time and patience. It's different for everyone, and you can't push it. I never should've tried.

What I should have done was back off and let Ginny heal on her own. I shouldn't have tried to date her. It wasn't our time and I created more heartache by trying.

…

Ginny cut in. "It was just as much my fault as yours. I knew I wasn't ready, I knew I was still grieving, but I continued to take advantage of you. I should've told you to back off and give me time. And meant it this time."

…

Well, the point is we made some very bad decisions then.

The worst of all was on a hot night two weeks before Ginny was to leave for Hogwarts.

**AN: As always, review, _review_, review!**

**Also, PurplePrincess77 suggested that I write this same sort of story for Hermione and Ron. I think it'd be really fun, but I'd like to get more opinions on it to make sure I'm not wasting my time. So, I put a poll up on my profile about it, please please please take it! I'd really appreciate it! **

**Don't worry though, I wont start the Ron/Hermione story until I'm finished with this one.** **I'm just putting up the poll now because I figured this way I'd get more responses as opposed to giving it a deadline of a week. **


	4. Chapter 4

****AN: In this chapter there are adult themes, and opinions shared about those adult things. It might seem preachy, but I promise that trying to promote those views are not my intention. Like most parents, Harry and Ginny are just trying to teach their children. Sorry if you totally disagree with their opinion, I hope you can see past it and enjoy the story anyways. **  
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**Chapter 4: The Best Worst Night of Our Lives**

Kids, We made a lot of mistakes back then. All of these choices led us to the best worst night of our lives. At the time I thought it was the best night of my life, but looking back I know better. It was a massive mistake.

Once I got my flat, your mum and I started spending a lot of time there instead of the Burrow. She told me that it was easier to be away from her family. There wasn't much to do there, so we'd cook, or clean, play cards, read together. Those weren't bad decisions; in fact, it was probably good for both of us. But I know now that I shouldn't have been alone like that when she was depressed.

When she was sad we both forgot sense. She needed comfort, and I wanted to do anything to make her happy. We were idiots.

That day I had been expecting her but she came much later than usual. It was nearly eight when she came over, and she was a complete mess.

She'd obviously been crying-her hair was up in a messy bun, face a blotchy mess, and eyes pink-but she looked beautiful never-the-less.

"What's wrong?" I asked taking her in my arms.

"I miss them so much." She sobbed.

"I know." I tried to sooth her. We sat on my dinky little sofa clutching each other. And one thing lead to another...

…

"Well... Did you...?" Lilly said. All the children shared faces of mixed emotion: surprise, disgust, and a little curiosity.

I looked at Ginny She looked back, her lips pressed together in opposition. She didn't want to reveal this part, but it was necessary. She gave a curt nod with a grudging expression.

"Yes, kids, we did."

They blanched, shaking their heads.

"Ugh, too much information Pop." James shook his head in disgust.

"Sorry, but it's necessary." I shrugged.

"Oh my gosh! Did you get pregnant and give up the baby?" Lily said wild with accusations. "Do we have a secret sister or brother somewhere out in the world?"

"Whoa, whoa Lil." Ginny held up her hands. "I didn't get pregnant!"

"We weren't that stupid.

"Oh, thank Merlin!"

We both shuddered.

...

So your mum wasn't pregnant, but it was still an absolute horrid thing to do.

But I didn't feel that way at all in the morning.

I'd never felt so happy in my entire life. I couldn't imagine ever being sad again if I lived to be a thousand. The sun was shinning and I turned to see your mother sleeping. She was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen.

I had no idea that she wouldn't feel the same way.

…

Ginny interrupted here. "Now that's not true. When I awoke, I was happier than I'd ever been. I felt incredible, but then reality set in. That's the thing kids, you can do so many things that will make you happy, but they come at a price. There are always consequences." Ginny sighed shaking her head. I still wish we had waited, so much, children."

…

Yes, so while your mum was having this realization, I was in the kitchen whistling away and frying bacon. It never entered my mind that she'd be anything but as elated as I was.

What a shock waited for me when I had gone to see if she was awake and there she was in my room, stumbling into her clothes, and crying her eyes out.

I was so startled. "Ginny! What is it? What's wrong?"

"I'm a horrible person," she said. I put my hands on her shoulders, but she pushed me back. "No, Harry, don't!" she said. "I don't know how you can even look at me."

I was amazed. "What are you talking about?"

"I'm the most disgusting, selfish, horrible girl in the world," she said.

"What? No, you aren't." I tried to hold her again, but she slapped my hands away. "Ginny you're the most beautiful wonderful woman ever. I love you." She buried her face in her hands and sobbed harder.

"Oh Harry," she said over and over, rocking back and forth. "I've ruined everything."

"No, Ginny, stop talking like this," I was finally able to wrap my arms around her. "What is this? Please, tell me. I need to know, so I can fix it."

I waited until she was ready to speak and she looked me in the eyes. "I love you, Harry," she said, "so much, with every fiber of my being."

"And I love you." I was still so confused.

"But what we did, everything last night," she shook her head, "that wasn't out of love, I was using you as comfort."

"I don't care," I said, and I meant it. "It was still the most amazing night of my life."

She cried harder.

"But, Harry, don't you see? We just gave up our first time together, and it wasn't even out of love. It was completely selfish."

"Ginny, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I took that from you."

"No, no, no," She said. "You gave me everything. I'm the one that stole it from you. You're so loving, and I'm horrible."

"Ginny, stop this," I said. "I don't care. So what, you took it, I never wanted anything more than to give it to you."

"Oh, Harry." She shook her head. "You're so selfless." She got up. "I can't do this to you any more." She headed for the door.

"NO!" I grabbed her arm. "Don't leave!"

"I have to," she said."You deserve so much better. I'm sorry that I took everything from you. Tell the next girl I'm sorry."

"No, Ginny, don't." Now I was almost crying. "I need you. I love you."

She gave me one sorrowful look, and then pulled out her wand and disapparated.

Crushed, I plummeted to the floor and let the tears take over.

…

The kids looked at us with puzzlement.

I turned to Ginny; she hated talking about this part. She frowned at me. "Breaking up with you was the hardest thing I ever did."

"I don't get it," Lilly said.

Ginny sighed. "Kids, you can only give up your virginity once, to one person. And when you do, you should do it out of love. Your father did just that, he loved me and so I gave him the best part of me. And I loved him too, very much. But when I took the best part of him, it wasn't out of love. When I came to realize that, it broke my heart. I couldn't believe what I had done to him, and it made me see that dating him was wrong in the first place. We had to break up. I was a complete mess."

"Wow, I didn't know you two were so old fashion," James snorted.

Ginny shot him a nasty look. "James, you'll understand when you're older and more mature."

"But weren't you the same age I am now?" James said.

"Exactly. You don't have to make the same mistake we did," Ginny said.

**AN: Review, _review_, REVIEW :) **


	5. Chapter 5

**So, WOW it's been a long time. I didn't expect it to take this long, but there was tons of interference. I took a break to find a beta, which took FOREVER. And then right when I got one, my laptop with all my stories crashed. Yeah, that was fun. But here I finally am with chapter 5! Also, I've re-published the previous chapters, so they're better than before.  
>It's kinda sad that I'm coming back with this chapter though, it's not terribly exciting. But it' better written than the previous chapters, so I'm hoping you'll enjoy it :)<br>**

**Chapter 5: The Best Advice  
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So there I was, kids, shattered, on the floor, heart broken and confused. So many terrible things had happened to me, but this was one of the worst. At the time it almost felt as bad as seeing my friends die. I crawled into a deep dark hole, and never expected to get out.

My days smeared into one long stretch of nothingness. I only knew that any time passed at all from the changes in the sky outside my bedroom window. Owls started arriving, I'd look to see if they were from Ginny, and when they weren't, I didn't bother to read the contents. At first I held out hope that one of them would be from her, but that hope dwindled as the days dragged on.

Then, I started getting visitors. Ron and Hermione came banging on my door, insisting that I tell them what had happened. I must have put dozens of spells on my door to keep them out.

I don't know how I managed to do absolutely nothing but eat crisps for a week, but it happened. I just sat in my bathrobe, slumped on my sofa. And how did I even spend the time? Pondering everything I'd ever done or said to Ginny. Every time we'd done so little as share a glance. I made a mental list of all the millions of mistakes I thought I'd made.

It was my own personal hell. I tortured myself. Because kids, if you look back trying to find mistakes, you wont have any problems. There are so many of them, in hindsight, that you never notice unless you hunt for them. I was consumed by the memories, I couldn't take them back or change anything. All the idiotic comments, selfishness, and inconsiderate acts were in the past. Nothing I could ever do would change what I'd done, and how Ginny had reacted.

After almost two weeks, I finally gave up. I was still a wreck, but I knew that just sitting there wouldn't change anything. So I actually took a shower, a long, hot one, and I put real clothes on.

All I wanted to do was go and find Ginny, to talk some sense into her. Get her to realize that I loved her and didn't care if she just wanted to just be friends, I had to see her.

Luckily, for all of us, Hermione chose that day to come visit me. If she hadn't, who knows what awful things might have happened. Hermione just has a sixth sense and knew to come then, her timing was impeccable, as always.

I was just getting ready to leave when she began banging on the door of my flat.

She started yelling, "Harry Potter! You let me in right now or I'll blast this door down!" She kept pounding, and after briefly considering defying her, I sighed and let her in.

It was difficult to see Hermione. I'd always told her everything, including problems with girls. And a part of me wanted to tell her then too, but this was about Ginny. Ron couldn't know, ever, or he would tell all of his brothers and they would in turn jinx me into jelly.

Besides that, I truly believed that telling Ron about what had really happened would ruin our friendship, and I'm still sure that if he knew, he'd never forgive me.

In a way, I'm glad that I never told him about all of this, and he still doesn't know. To this day he thinks we only split up because your mum needed some space, I was going through a tough time dealing with the aftermath of the Battle of Hogwarts and she was going back there to finish her education.

**And he never will know the truth kids, or you'll all be in very big trouble.**

Anyway, when I opened the door for Hermione she frowned at me, clucking her tongue at the state I was in. Even though I'd finally showered, I still must have looked terrible. Sleep deprived, depressed, likely malnourished, and this hair certainly doesn't help. You think it's mad now, you should have seen it twenty years ago.

"Finally!" She huffed, pushing past me into the sitting room. She set her things down on my tiny dining table and surveyed the room for a few seconds before turning her attention back to me. "Harry, what the hell?" She demanded, hands on hips.

I was so brain dead, I just stared back, stupidly. She raised one eyebrow after a few seconds' silence from me before launching into a tirade.

"Almost two weeks! You don't reply to my owls, wont open the door. Ron says you haven't shown up for work! He's worried too, been trying to come and see you as well. You could have been dead for all we knew! On top of that, Ginny wont say anything-"

I interrupted at the sound of her name. "Wait, you've seen Ginny?"

"Not much." Hermione sighed, her shoulders dropped but she looked slightly pleased that she'd finally gotten a reaction out of me. "She stays cooped up in her room. I don't know if she's in a fit state to go back to Hogwarts. I have a feeling you've got everything to do with this."

"Yes." I admitted miserably, slumping onto the sofa. "It's all my fault."

Hermione looked me over and took a seat next to me, perched on the edge of the sofa. She finally seemed to really see me, and see just how badly I was being affected by what was going on.

"Harry?" Her voice was gentle. "Harry, what happened?"

I looked up at her, torn as to wether I should tell her or not, but at the same time desperate to get some of the guilt off my chest. "I don't know if I can tell you."

"Because of Ron?" She guessed, correctly. "You don't want him to know, do you? Oh, don't tell me you've done something so idiotic that the entire Weasley clan will want to jinx you?"

I nodded and she sighed, before I voiced my question.

"Can I trust you?"

"Of course you can trust me, Harry."

"And you can't tell Ron, ever. Or anyone else."I specified.

"I won't. I promise."

"I mean ever, Hermione. Fifty years from now, eighty. Until your dying day you cannot tell Ron, or any one else. This is serious, I don't think he'd ever forgive me, even fifty years from now."

Hermione looked at me for a few more seconds. She seemed to be weighing options in her head, but after almost a full minute she began to nod, slowly.

"Alight, Harry. I promise, no matter what you tell me, I won't repeat it to Ron. I might turn your kneecaps around and give you boils in unmentionable places for a few months, but even if I marry Ron Weasley, I won't betray your confidence."

"Thank-you, Hermione." I believed her, trusted her implicitly, like I always have. Your aunt has always been one of the most trustworthy, honest people I have ever known.

So I told her everything, about how we'd started dating again, and everything that we'd done all summer. It was painful to tell her about Ginny leaving, but I had to. So I retold everything Ginny had said to me, all I'd said and done to her, with her, for her.

Hermione was quiet, just listening, hands folded in her lap, not interrupting and not even raising an eyebrow at all the gory details. When I was done she sighed.

"Oh Harry, this is really a mess."

"I know, it's all my fault." I'd leaned forward on the couch as I spoke, but slumped back and covered my face with my hands when confronted with the reality of it... that the mess wasn't all in my head and that Hermione could see it, too.

"Well, it is sort of her fault, too." Hermione told me. " Although, you really shouldn't have pushed her to get back together, or slept with her."

"I know, I know, I know! I wish I could take it back, I do!"

"Let me finish." Hermione remained calm. "But it takes two to tango, Harry. Ginny shouldn't have let you talk her into it. She knew she wasn't ready to be with you, that you weren't ready for a relationship so soon after everything that's happened, but she did anyway. She knew she was probably depressed and definitely vulnerable when she started coming over here. She let this happen, too."

I remember getting mad, then, and glared at her. "If you're trying to turn me against Ginny, it wont work."

"Harry! I would never do that, Ginny is my friend, too. I'm just saying, she's not totally blameless in this situation. You can't try and take everything on yourself."

"Whatever, Hermione," I sighed. "I have to go find her. I'm going to get her back."

"What? You idiot!" Hermione got to her feet, outraged. "No way! The whole point I was trying to make is that you two aren't ready for this, neither of you! The only good decision Ginny's made in this whole debacle was when she walked out on you! Don't mess that up, too!"

That shut me up.

Hermione took a deep breath, then sat back down.

"Harry, I know it's hard, but I'm trying to help you. Leave Ginny alone. She needs time to process everything, to get her head straight. So do you. Leave it alone, at least for a while. Can you do that?"

It was one of the hardest things I've ever done, kids, but I nodded, and promised Aunt Hermione that I wouldn't go after your mum, that I'd let her come to me, when she was ready.

…

"Probably the best advice Hermione has ever given you, and the best promise she's ever extracted from either of us." Ginny put in.

"Definitely." I agreed.

"So, that was it?" Al asked.

"Yes." Ginny and I answered in unison.

"I didn't even see her again before she left for Hogwarts to finally go back and do her final years."

Ginny looked at me, and then the clock pointedly. I saw it was after ten.

"Well that's enough for one night." I decided. "Off to bed now."

**AN: Review please! From now on, I promise to reply to all of your reviews individually. So please take a moment to type something up, it's the only payment we FF writers get!**  
><strong>And don't forget to take the poll on my profile!<strong>

**Hopefully I'll get chapter 6 up soon, but i kinda depends on my beta :)  
><strong>


	6. Chapter 6

**AN: So yeah I took forever again, finals were KILLER. But here we go again. Another small, seemingly insignificant chapter. But I swear this is all going somewhere and everything will eventfully add up and make sense. In the mean time, thanks for reading and trusting in this drivel :)  
><strong>

**Chapter 6: The First of Many Awful Christmases to Come  
><strong>

"Ready to hear more kids?" I asked when we finished lunch the next day.

"I don't know." James made a face, and Albus shrugged.

"Oh I do!" Lilly was chipper as ever, and eager. "I want to know what happened next."

"It's gotten pretty gross." James groaned. "I don't know if I want to hear this stuff about my parents."

"Oh grow up." Al rolled his eyes. "I think it's sort of interesting."

"We're leaving out the really good stuff," Ginny said. She raised her eyebrows to emphasize her euphemism of solicitous details. James grimaced.

We all went back to the sitting room, resuming the same positions from the day before.

…

So weeks later your mum was on a train to Hogwarts, and I had a new determination. Somewhere in my obsessive thoughts I actually had a good idea. I was going to get her back, but I was going to do it by waiting. As long as it took. If she wasn't ready after Hogwarts, I'd wait. If she needed until we were thirty, I would wait.

But I had to straighten myself up. I went back to work, and I worked hard. I was just in training then, but they let me do a lot of things regular trainees don't. I put my all into that work, and started to feel really good about it. Knowing you're making a difference is a very invigorating feeling.

Everyday I tried to stay happy and positive. But within I couldn't help but think that Ginny would never want me back again. Still, I had to try.

"There are plenty of other girls out there," Rowland, one of my auror friends, said one day over tea. I'd told him all about Ginny and my plans; he thought I was completely bonkers. "Especially for you, Mr. Famous. I'm sure plenty of witches are interested. Why are you so worked up over one?"

"Because she's _the_ one," I said. I knew, even then.

Rowland just snorted and shook his head. "I was once your age and said that about girls that definitely weren't my wife."

"Well you were wrong, but I'm not." I shrugged.

"So you really believe you'll marry this girl?" He was skeptical.

"Absolutely." I always knew your mom was the only thing I doubted was myself. Could I be the one for her?

Rowland laughed. "If you actually marry this girl I will give you a hundred galleons."

"You're on." I agreed extending my hand to shake on it. He looked at my hand like it was a joke.

"And what happens when you marry someone else?"

"_If _that were to happen then I'd be the one paying you."

"Alright." He shook my hand.

I collected that money on our wedding day. I collected on a lot of bets that day; but that will come up later.

Not soon enough, it was Christmas. And that meant Ginny was coming home.

I didn't plan to push her, but I really wanted to get on terms where we could at least send owls to each other.

But Hermione was always ready to stop my advances. The day before she and Ginny were to arrive I got an urgent letter. _It said, "__Harry, Ginny is__not__ready. Don't try anything while she's there. Just leave her alone. I'm serious, she's not ready at all."_

I reread the unwelcome letter over and over.

Millions of emotions rushed through me quickly. Anguish, irritation, sorrow, impatience, depression, confusion. I couldn't settle on just one.

Yes, I'd promised to wait for Ginny until the end of time, but I expected to at least be allowed to be her friend.

I didn't blame Ginny, I blamed myself. I blamed the world for screwing me over, _once again_.

I knew I couldn't do it, I couldn't see her and not do anything. So I sent Hermione a quick reply.

"_Hermione, I appreciate you trying to help me, but I'd like for this Christmas to not be entirely awful. Didn't you say you were spending the holiday with your parents this year? Would you mind me staying with you instead? It'd really appreciate it." _

…

"So I spent a quiet Christmas with Hermione at her parents' house."

"I'm glade you did," Ginny said. "I don't know how I would've dealt with you being there for Christmas. It was bad enough without you."

"Well, I had a miserable Christmas, either way. But perhaps this was better."

**AN: I wont promise the next chapter can get up soon, but I'll try my best :)**  
><strong>I will however promise to reply to all reviews, so write one! I need to know your thoughts and feelings. Pluss, it's how I know anyone is even reading at all! :D<strong>  
><strong>Thanks for reading!<strong>


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7: Additions to the Family  
><strong>

**AN: Finally the much awaited chapter 7! Woot woot! Sorry it took so long, I'll try to NEVER take this long again :D  
><strong>

** We pretty much don't know a single thing about Percy's wife, Audrey. So for my other story, _Until We Meet Again_, I sort of invented her looks and characteristics. I decided to make her the same, and have the same back story with Percy for this story as well. So if you've read my other story, this chapter will have a lot of similarities to _UWMA_ chapter 11. Is it illegal to plagiarize yourself? ;) **

I scrapped the hundredth failed letter with a huff. I'd wasted all evening with this miserable business. Sending your mother an owl was completely out, but that didn't stop me from writing letters I didn't plan to send.

It was the end of January, and I couldn't believe I had to wait another five dreadful months.

There was a single bang on the door, and then your uncle, Ron's voice. "Harry! I'm coming in."

"Help yourself," I grumbled, getting up from my desk. I went out to find Ron taking off his coat in my sitting room. He'd set a folder over flowing with parchment on the coffee table.

"Harry," He greeted, taking off his gloves. "I brought you more info on the-"

Kids, even though it's been twenty years, I still can't tell you what we were working on then. No more than I can tell you what I work on now. The point is, Ron came over to discuss the case with me. Then I changed the subject.

"So, how is the flat search going?"

"I actually just found a place," Ron answered as he set the folder straight again. "It'll be so nice to be on my own. Mum keeps pressuring me about my future. Like being an auror isn't enough!"

"What are mums for?"

"And things are getting sort of awkward with Percy," Ron continued shaking his head.

"How so?" I wondered.

"Well, he's got a girlfriend now..."

"Percy does?" I couldn't believe it. "How does he find time while being a workaholic?"

"No clue." Ron shrugged. "But he's been acting all... Weird about it."

"Have you met her yet?"

"Just once," Ron answered. "She's nice, a bit funny too. But it's just weird to have Percy acting like this."

"What's her name?"

"Audrey something-I-can't-remember."

She was your aunt Audrey.

"If you come over for dinner Sunday, you can meet her," Ron offered.

"Oh," I looked away. "I don't know..."

I still hadn't gotten over how weird it was to see your mother's family. It made me nervous, like any second they'd find out what I'd done, and blast me out the door.

Your Grandmother had been trying to get me to visit more and more, but I always came up with excuses. That was hard to do, because I still wanted to see them any ways.

"Oh come on!" Ron insisted. "Mum is always bothering me about getting you to visit more. She worries about you."

"I know." I shifted uncomfortably. "I miss her meals any ways."

Ron grinned. "Who wouldn't! That's one of the main reasons I put off getting my own place."

I beamed back. "Alright, I'll come over."

"Good, otherwise mum would-"

Beat him. Kids, Ron said, "beat me".

...

That Sunday, everyone was there as usual, but the Weasleys were much smaller back then. There were your grandparents of course, Uncle Bill and Aunt Fluer didn't have any children yet, Uncle George wasn't even dating Aunt Angelina, Uncle Percy brought Aunt Audrey, and of course Ron and I were there. Uncle Charlie was in Hungary caring for dragons.

As usual, when I arrived, Grandma smothered me with hugs, complained that I didn't visit enough, and pointed out that I was far too skinny. She has always been that way.

Audrey was sitting by Percy on one of the sofas. She looked up at me with large animated blue eyes and smiled sweetly. Back then all of your aunt's hair was honey colored, and she was quite pretty.

"You must be Harry," She greeted coming over to shake my hand. "I'm Audrey Toulson."

"Nice to meet you," I said back, shaking her hand.

"Well, let's eat," Grandma spoke up. "I trust you've set everything up?" She looked to Grandpa and Uncle Bill.

"Of course," Grandpa replied leading the way outside.

"Do you work at the Ministry?" I asked as we went out to the dinner table.

"Oh no," Audrey giggled lightly. "It's too stuffy there, fine for Percy." She shot him an adoring look. "But never for me. I work at a fashion workshop, where I design clothes. Mostly dresses, but I make bags too."

We all sat down and began to eat, the whole table buzzing with conversations.

"You should tell him how you two met," Ron suggested to Audrey as he snarfed down the steak. "It's a great story."

I don't know if you kids have ever heard this story, I only heard it this one time, and this is how they told it.

Audrey batted her eyelashes at Percy, leaning closer. "He almost arrested me."

I nearly spit out the rice I was just swallowing in surprise.

Audrey laughed. "It really was funny! Percy, you tell."

Percy was stiff as ever, but his lips curved ever so slightly into a smile. "Well I was visiting Diagon Alley a couple months ago." He explained. "And I saw this gathering in a dark alley, which always means trouble. I went to go investigate and found Audrey trying to sell enchanted jewelry. Without a permit, I found out."

"I didn't know it was illegal!" She threw her head back in laughter. "I'm muggle-born!"

"Any ways," Percy continued, shaking his head. "I got rid of the crowd and asked her what she was doing."

"I explained that I had no idea that what I was doing was wrong," Audrey cut in, "But he still tried to take me in. Luckily, I had some instant darkness powder. Thanks mate!" She held out a hand to George, which he enthusiastically smacked. "Anyways, I was out of there in a second."

"Well I would've tracked you down," Percy spoke up, "But the ministry had more important matters to take care of."

"Right." Audrey rolled her eyes.

"Anyways." Percy continued. "Then I run into her five day latter-"

"It was six," Audrey interrupted.

Percy sighed. "We've been here before, it was five."

"Definitely six," Audrey disagreed firmly.

"Forget it." Percy huffed. "Some days latter, I see her again, this time not doing anything illegal. She was in the Leaky Caldron, just sitting down to dinner. I wasn't sure what to do. I couldn't just bring her in if she wasn't doing anything, so I decided to just talk and explain that she couldn't sell without a certified permit, or next time I'd arrest her."

"But the thing is," Audrey spoke up, "I didn't recognize him at all. I'm just trying to enjoy my soup when some red head comes up and starts telling me I need a selling permit. I thought it was some sort of bizarre pick-up line."

Everyone laughed except Percy. His cheeks were turning pink.

"So I was trying to figure out what he wanted, and then I finally recognized him, and asked if he was going to arrest me. He was so nice and agreed not to," Audrey said ending on a sweet note and giving Percy another adoring expression. "I offered to buy him dinner as a thank you, and the rest is history!"

…

"No way!" James said. "Did that really happen?"

"That's the story they tell," I answered shrugging.

"I had no idea!" Lilly giggled.

"They probably have the best Weasley love story," Ginny said with a chuckle.

…

"Have you decided what you'll name the baby?" Grandma asked Bill and Fleur. The table got quiet except for the scratching from Ron scraping the gravy off his plate.

"Mum," Bill protested. "We really wanted to announce that!"

"You waited too long!" Grandma said. "Fleur is already four months along! Everyone has already noticed her bump."

I hadn't, and from everyone's expressions I guessed that Audrey was the only one that had.

"Well, it's out now any ways," Bill sighed.

"Oh, is it a boy or girl?" Audrey asked enthusiastically.

"A girl," Fleur answered proudly placing a hand on a small bump I'd just noticed at her stomach. "She will be joining us in May."

"Well that's wonderful!" Grandpa raised his glass joyfully. "To the first of the next generation!" We all drank to that.

I hadn't realized how much I'd really missed the Weasleys until I was there that night. But when I was with them, eating, joking, laughing; I felt more at home than any where else I'd ever been. It made me regret not coming over any more.

And I knew, I just felt it all over, that I belonged with that family. I could never be as happy with another.

So that very simple night invigorated me to not give up on Ginny. Yes it was hard. Excruciatingly painful. However, the reward would be worth it.

And kids, I was right. More than I could've imagined then.

…

"And now," Ginny interrupted, "We need to put this on hold. Uncle Ron and Aunt Hermione are coming over for dinner, and we've got to get ready."

"Aw." Lilly sighed while her brothers groaned.

"Come on, hurry along," Ginny ordered, as she got up. She began assigning the kids chores.

"The rest will have to wait."

**AN: Thanks so much for reading! And for my loyal fans: Thanks so much for your patience!  
>I'll try to get the next chapter up soon, but finals start next week, so you'll probably have to wait until they're over.<br>**

** As always, I promise to reply to all reviews, nice or not :)**


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8: Disappointment**

**AN: I intended to upload this on Monday, but my revisions got delayed after watching the Once Upon a Time finale. I've been a useless lump in a drunken daze ever since. But now here it is, and I hope you enjoy :D  
><strong>

"That was an excellent meal," Hermione complemented as she finished her first serving. Ron was beside her scarfing down his second.

"Thanks, Hermione." Ginny smiled back. "Always happy to have you lot over."

Al and Rose were sitting together engaged in a lively discussion, while Lilly was talking Hugo's ear off, and James was transfiguring his fork with a bored expression.

"Are you ready for your sixth year of Hogwarts, Rose?" I asked my niece.

"I think so." She took a long calming breath, and then smiled. She bore a striking resemblance to Hermione when she did so.

"Do you know what you want to do after school?" Ginny asked.

"I'm thinking the Department of Mysteries."

"Oh that's cool!" Al said. "Didn't you work there for a while, Aunt Hermione?"

"Assisted more like, and for a short time at that." She replied. "It was very enlightening, though still more confusing."

"I didn't like you working there," Ron spoke up, grimacing. "You spent all of your time with that Alden character."

"Oh please." Hermione rolled her eyes. "It was twenty years ago! We just worked together."

"Well he had different ideas."

Ginny and Hermione shared a look before rolling their eyes. James suddenly looked up, his face lit.

"Dad has been telling us about how he and mum got together," he said to his aunt and uncle.

"Oh really." Hermione looked at Ginny and me. "What a nice idea."

"Pretty dull story so far," James continued, now looking at Ron. "Except for a few things I never wanted to know."

I shot James a warning look, and he smiled back smugly.

"Oh?" Ron was confused. "Like what?" He was clueless as ever.

"Well a bunch of things they did as a couple that _no one_, especially their children, want to hear about."

Ron still looked confused until he caught on. Hermione was staring transfixed at the wall as if it was the most interesting thing she'd ever seen. Al and Lilly looked at the table in embarrassment, and Hugo and Rose gazed around looking for an explanation.

"These things..." Ron was looking at his sister fiercely now. Ginny just smiled innocently. "Are we talking about while you two were dating?"

"You want to hear the truth?" Ginny asked now somber.

Ron just glared.

"The truth," Ginny said, "is that Harry and I never even kissed out of wedlock."

Hermione burst into giggles.

"No way!" Hugo said. "Are you serious?"

Ron looked less fierce now, but still unhappy. "Ginny, I saw you two kiss plenty at Hogwarts alone." Hermione continued to laugh, I joined in a little too.

"You calling me a liar?" Ginny mockingly demanded.

"You're all bonkers." Lilly rolled her eyes.

Ron didn't say anything else about it, but he kept shooting me these looks, like I was a traitor. It was hard not to roll my eyes and laugh back.

...

When they left I immediately turned to James. "Son, I'm not surprised - which is sad."

James gave a cocky smile. "I didn't actually tell him anything."

"To think we wanted a son so bad before you were born!" Ginny huffed looking skyward.

"What a mistake that was," I agreed.

"Hey!" Al protested.

"Well we didn't succeed the first time," Ginny explained. "So we decided to try again, and we got you dear." She smiled at Al. James looked very unaffected by all this.

"Daddy." Lilly reappeared from her room. "Won't you tell us more of the story?"

I looked at Ginny, she sighed. "I suppose there's time for more tonight."

…

The next few months after that were better, but still awful. It's hard to describe to someone that's never experienced it, but breaking up is really terrible in so many ways.

If I didn't have Ron and Hermione, or the visits to the Burrow, I have no idea how bad it would've been. Those months were full of top secret Auror business I really can't share with you.

…

"Oh come on dad!" James said. "It was over twenty years ago! Couldn't you tell us now?"

"No," I answered firmly. "Not a chance."

He groaned in protest.

"Dad." Lilly wanted to change the subject. "If you can't tell us anything about the rest of the school year, maybe Mum can?"

I looked at Ginny. She wore a sorry expression.

"I don't have much to say about that last year at Hogwarts." She shuddered. "It was terrible. I had to work so hard, while feeling terrible the whole time."

The kids looked unsatisfied.

"I really don't want to talk about it." Ginny sighed.

I spoke up, gently taking Ginny's hand. "So I'll continue." She gave me a grateful smile.

…

Not much happened during those few months that I can tell you about. That is, besides Uncle Percy and Aunt Audrey getting engaged. That happened in April, I believe. And they set the date for November.

Uncle Ron was just as impatient for the school term to be over, and just as stressed by auror life. To unwind, we began spending a lot of time at the Leaky Cauldron, and Neville soon joined us. Back then he was an auror too. Every Saturday night we found ourselves there sharing a pint or two, to unwind.

"What about her?" Ron nodded to a blond witch drinking over a large novel.

"She's pretty," I agreed giving Neville a thumbs up.

He looked down in embarrassment. "Stop it."

"Stop what?"

"Trying to hook me up with random witches."

"Oh come on, you're the only one here not hung up on some bird!" Ron chuckled.

"So you'd like me to join you in your misery?"

That shut us up.

"Terms almost over, and then we'll see who's miserable," Ron muttered into his cup. Neville smiled.

Moments later a grey barn owl fluttered in, and dropped a letter into my lap. Ron recognized the handwriting right away.

"Why'd Hermione send you a letter instead of me?" he asked.

"Try not to get too jealous." I smirked and ripped it open.

It said: "_Harry, I know you've been patiently awaiting the end of term, but I'm afraid your efforts have been for naught. Ginny has signed up for a four month trip to Russia with some of her pupils. She's leaving as soon as the term is over, and wont return until Percy's wedding._

_In addition__, she's not in a much better state. I really don't think she's ready to see you at all._ _The good news though, is that I truly believe this trip of hers will do her good. She could really use a __holiday,_ _some distance and fresh air will profit her greatly._

_I know it's hard for you, but this is really for the best._

_You'll have to wait longer, but it should be worth the wait. _

_I'm sorry, Hermione."_

"What does it say?" Ron asked.

"Nothing." I shoved the note into my pocket. "Ginny's going to Russia."

"Oh." Neville winced. "Tough break."

"Yeah." I sunk into my chair, and stared blankly at the table.

After a long depressing pause, Ron slapped me on the back. "Hey! You know what we should do? We should play Knuts."

Knuts was this great drinking game we used to play where we'd take all the knuts we had handy and-

...

Ginny gave a shove and a protesting look.

I looked at the kid's. James leaned forward eagerly with a mischievous grin, Lilly looked surprised, and Al bewildered.

"You know what." I realized this was a bad idea. "I'll save that for another time."

"Great." James leaned back in disappointment rolling his eyes.

…

Anyways, I said, "No thanks, I think I'll head home." I rose from the table.

"Oh come on!" Ron said. "Moping won't make it better."

"See you on Monday." I turned away and apparated out.

I couldn't believe it. Once again I would have to wait.

I wondered if the wait would ever be over. It appeared that I'd be chasing after a lost cause for the rest of my life.

I wanted to be hopeful, I really did. But it was getting more and more difficult.

I was beginning to wonder if Ginny knew she was torturing me and wanted to keep it up as punishment.

…

"I most certainly did not," Ginny piped in.

"Well I know that now." I laughed.

"Ugh, how long is this going to take?" James whinned.

"Quite a while longer," I admitted.

"Oh, shut up," Al said tohis brother, as the elder groaned. "It's not like you have anything better to do."

James shot him a nasty look.

"Well, I can go ahead and skip to Uncle Percy's wedding, if that's what you'd isn't much else that happened that summer," I said.

"Yes, please." His eyes were mockingly urgent.

"Alright, November fifth, nineteen ninety-nine."

**AN: Reviews are always answered :)**


	9. Chapter 9

**AN: Thanks to all of you lovely people that write reviews, favorite, or follow this story! Y'all keep me positive, motivated, and happy :)  
>This chapter is for all of you that watch How I Met Your Mother, I think you'll find a scene familiar :D<strong>

**Chapter 9**

"This suit is strangling me." Ron complained adjusting his tie. "I can't believe we have to have a muggle wedding."

"I guess it's not really up to us." I was so nervous, my hands were literally shaking. "Where is Hermione?" I was getting irritated.

"I dunno." Ron huffed, still struggling with his tie. "Probably still getting ready."

Just then there was a knock. "Is it safe to come in?" Hermione asked thorough the door.

"Yes, please hurry." I replied.

She came in wearing a nice muggle dress that was a dark purple, or perhaps red colored, and her hair was up in an elegant twist. She took a look at Ron and chuckled.

"Having trouble, Ronald?"

He gave her a withering look, and continued to conflict with his outfit. Hermione went over to help.

"Is she here yet?" I asked.

"Yes." Hermione sighed. "But she's a bride's maid, she has to get ready."

"Of course."

Hermione turned to me, eyes gentle. "Harry," Her voice was soft and gentle as silk. "Please, just don't get your hopes up. None of us have heard anything from her at all. I just don't know what state she's in right now."

I nodded in acknowledgment, but didn't really take in Hermione's word's. I was so irritably tired of waiting. I was firm in my resolve, but I needed assurance. At the very least, I just wanted to see Ginny happy again. A wedding seemed the perfect place.

It was a muggle traditional wedding, because of Audrey's family. Besides her parents, none of them knew she was a witch, so there couldn't be a magical ceremony. They held it at an old muggle church with a rather large procession.

Audrey's best friend, I can't remember her name, came in to tell us the ceremony would be starting soon.

Ron - looking much better -, Hermione, and I went to take our seats in the bustling crowd.

I waited anxiously to see Ginny, and finally the music began.

Two other bridesmaids and groomsmen came out, and then there was finally Ginny. When I saw her radiantly walking down the isle beaming with joy, I let out a satisfied breath.

The trip had been for good. There she was, happy again. It had all been worth it.

All those long months. All those miserable nights. Every ache and pain. They all seemed to go away. Because when I saw her, I knew why it was worth it in just a split second.

Audrey and Percy gleefully exchanged vows, and then we all happily went to the reception. There I sat through what felt like endless toasts and speeches. It soon blended into one long drone in my mind.

At last it was time to dance.

Urgently gazing through the flow of many bodies, I searched for Ginny.

Finally my gaze found her standing alone beside one of the tables. She was smiling, and gazing through the crowd as well, in search of what I hoped was me. Beaming at my luck, I began pushing my way through the crowd.

Soon however I saw a curious sight. A tall, dark, and burly man had gone over to Ginny, and taken her hands. They smiled, and exchanged a few words before he bent down and kissed her right on the lips.

I froze, my nerves detached from the rest of my body. It's a wonder I didn't collapse there, in the middle of the dance floor.

All those pains, worries, insecurities, anxieties, irritations quickly came back, and swept through me again.

I had wasted over a year of my life. And for what? To have my heart smashed into little bits of rubble. Again.

Well I'd had it.

I just couldn't do this any more.

Before I knew it, I was storming out of the church. I found myself in a park bench by the church's play ground.

"Harry? What happened?" Hermione had followed me, thankfully alone.

"What happened?" I held back bitter tears. "What happened is I've wasted so much time being in love, and only made myself completely miserable."

Hermione sat down next to me. "Love can be like that sometimes." She whispered softly.

"I just, I can't take it any more."

Hermione was quiet for a long time while I practically rolled in agony.

Finally she spoke. "Harry, I'm going to give you the same advice I gave a friend years ago. Move on. Date other people. Live your life."

I buried my face in my hands.

"No. I'm completely done." I declared. "I'm done with dating, Im done with love." I scoffed at the word. "I never want this again."

"Harry-"

"No." I interrupted firmly. "I'm done."

And I meant it.

…

"So who was the man you kissed?" Lilly wondered.

"Oh." Ginny made a face. "That guy." She laughed. "His name was Milo. We dated for a little while, but he didn't really get me."

…

"I'm done with dating." I declared three weeks latter to Ron and Neville as we shared a drink at the Leaky Cauldron.

They exchanged a look, then burst into laughter.

"What? I'm serious." I insisted. They continued to laugh uncontrollably, perhaps partly because of their drunkenness. If I wasn't so irritated, their behavior would have been funny.

"Sure you are." Ron finally said, wiping a tear from his eye.

"You'll be engaged by the end of next year." Neville said, then snorted, which started more laughter.

"What are you talking about?" I demanded.

"Look Harry, it's just facts of life." Neville explained, now more serious, but still smiling. "People that say they aren't looking to date always end up in a serious relationship within a year."

I was about to retort when Ron spoke up.

"I remember Mum bugging Lupin about a girlfriend summer before our sixth year. He kept saying he was too busy with the Order. The _next spring_, **married**!"

I opened my mouth to protest but Neville joined in.

"Remember Mr. Peters, used to work here. Couple years ago he said that he was training to be a curse breaker, and he wouldn't have time for a relationship. _Nine months_ later, **married**!"

"Mandy Brocklehurst, said she wanted to take a holiday off. _Four months_ later, **married**!"

They were on a roll now, so I didn't bother trying to interrupt.

"Wayne Hopkins, said he wasn't interested in marriage for a few years, wanted to find a job. _A year_ later, **engaged**!"

"Katie Bell, said she was done with dating, wanted to focus on her career. _Two months_ later, **engaged**!"

"Callum Smith, announced he never planned to marry, would die alone. _Nine months_ later, **married**!"

"You see, Harry." Neville concluded. "It happened to all of them, and it will happen to you."

"But things are different with me!" I insisted.

Neville and Ron exchanged smirks.

"Right, sure they are." Ron laughed. "You're definitely getting engaged next year."

And he was right.

**AN: Thanks for reading :) All reviews are always answered, even if they're mean :)  
>And on the subject of reviews, I'd ask you anonymous (or otherwise) reviewers that rather than saying my story sucks, that you explain <em>why<em> it sucks. But I dunno, maybe I'm asking for too much!**


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

**AN: So thanks to everyone that took the poll, or messaged me about my dilemma, I really appreciate it!  
><strong>

Kids, Ron and Neville were right. Like most things, you find love when you _aren't _looking for it.

And that's exactly what happened to me February seventeenth, the year two-thousand. I was most definitely not looking to fall in love. It had been over three months, but I was still bitter and upset. I'd renounced love, and thrown myself into solely working.

Your mother, mean while, had started her Qudditch career in Ireland, and I didn't even see her at Christmas.

It was a miserable time.

Back then it was still difficult to be in a magical public place without being surrounded. Everyone recognized me, and everyone wanted to speak to me. It was very tiring.

So I began sticking to muggle places more and more. There, I could have a drink without being bothered. I could sit down to a meal without interruption. It was a much needed relaxation.

On that particular day I went into a small cafe, not knowing how fateful that decision was.

It was a small, brightly lit place that smelled exquisite, and always had customers, but was never crowded.

I took one of the small back tables and engrossed myself in a book. I must've sat there for twenty minutes before she came up.

"Excuse me, sir." I heard her sweet soprano voice.

I looked up and saw a short women looking at me with big baby blue eyes.

"Uh, yes?"

"When you came to this table, was there a mobile phone?" She asked. I now noticed that she looked rather urgent and upset. "I left mine here."

"Oh." I looked around trying to remember. "Sorry, I don't think so."

She swore under her breath, and looked like she wanted to kick something. "Sorry to bother you."

By then I'd taken a good look at her, and saw how simply beautiful she was. Not the stand out type, but still beautiful.

"I'm sorry. Perhaps you should try asking the management here." I suggested as she turned to leave.

"Oh, good idea. Thank you!" She hurried up to the shop's counter. I watched her go up and ask one of the staff, and they gave her the missing phone. She happily took it.

I got up from my seat, to go speak to her. I really didn't just talk to random girls like that, especially then when I was in my anti-love phase. But she was very pretty.

"Found it?" I asked.

"Yes." She replied gleefully. "Thank you!"

"I'm Harry. Harry Potter." I extended a hand. She looked at it and smiled. It was wonderful that she didn't instantly know everything about me.

"I'm Vivian." We shook. "Vivian Alden."

"Would you care to join me?" I daringly asked. "Even though you've already been here." I remembered.

She smiled. "Yeah, it'll be nice to sit down after my crazy day." We went back to my table and sat.

"I love this table." She said, gazing out the window. "It's so peaceful here."

"It's my favorite too." I agreed. "No one bothers me."

"Yes. Except, I guess I did."

I grinned. "That I didn't mind so much."

"Good, I hate to interrupt people. I really do."

"I'm happy to meet someone that actually cares." I smiled at her. She looked away smiling shyly. "So what do you do?"

"Oh, I'm in college." She answered. "I'm only nineteen, you?"

"I'm nineteen too."

"Oh! Are you a student here in london too?" She asked.

"Uh..." I hadn't thought of this question arising. "No, I already work as a... investigator actually."

Her eyes went wide. "Really? Did you graduate early or something?"

"I just did enough in school to qualify." I was making things up.

"Wow, that's amazing. What sort of cases do you work on?"

"They're confidential." That at least was true. She looked even more impressed. "What are you studying?" I didn't want to talk about myself any more.

"Marketing." She answered. She began to tell me all about it, but I honestly don't remember much of what she said. We were there for a long time, until her phone buzzed.

"Oh, sorry!" She exclaimed picking it up. "I have to take this!" She came back from the call looking harassed. "Sorry, but I have to go."

"That's too bad." I jumped up, wishing she could stay longer "Could I have your number before you go?"

She paused, thinking it over. "Harry, you seem really nice."

Those simple words made me feel happier than I had in a very long while.

"But honestly, I just got out of a pretty intense relationship."

"Me too." I admitted.

"I'm not sure I'm ready again."

"I understand." And despite my disappointment, I truly did. "But, what if I give you my number, and you call when you want to talk." My flat had come with a line I'd never used, but thankfully I'd bothered to memorize the number any ways.

Vivian smiled. "Alright." She took my number down, and left me standing there completely amazed.

I was actually feeling something again, something that had been buried deep deep down. Excitement, happiness, eagerness. I was now overwhelmed with the fantastic feelings. I got the urge to jump in the air in exclamation. I rushed over to one of the employees I saw working there almost every time I came in.

"Hi, did you see that girl I was sitting with?" I asked her.

"Yes." She answered in surprise.

"Does she come here often?"

"Pretty often." She answered.

I went to the manager and found out that Vivian came in every Tuesday and Saturday morning. I wouldn't leave seeing her again to fate.

That's another important thing about finding love, you have to act.

I did see Vivian again, the following Saturday. We sat together again, and talked the whole time. The next day she called me.

I walked into the warm pub. I found Ron and Hermione in the back laughing and holding hands.

"Hey guys." I greeted sitting down, and picking up a menu. "I'm feeling like stew."

We'd started a tradition the summer before to meet at this muggle restaurant every Thursday for lunch. A muggle place so we'd be left alone, and we did it to make sure we would still see each other.

"Whoa, Harry." Hermione spoke up. I put down my menu to see them both looking at me oddly. "You're smiling!"

"Hmm," I shrugged. "Guess I am." I went back to the menu.

"Alright." Ron said. "Who's the girl?"

"Guilty." I grinned setting aside the menu.

"Really?" Hermione was over-joyed. "Who is she?"

"Her name is Vivian Alden." I told them. "She's a student at a university, and a muggle."

"A muggle?" Ron was shocked. "Why'd you want to date one of them?" Hermione and I both gave him withering looks, but otherwise ignored his comment.

I told them everything about how we met and such.

"I thought you were 'done with dating'." Ron smirked.

I didn't know what to tell him.

"Just try not to get obsessed with this new girl." Hermione advised. "You got seriously messed up last time."

"I know, I know. I'll try."

But I felt that going crazy for Vivian would be all too easy.

**AN: So don't hate me for introducing a new love interest, there is a method to my madness! She'll help to make Harry not so depressed and stuff. Jeez this story has kinda been a downer, I don't know how you all have stuck with it! **  
><strong>But now I'll try to have more happiness! Happy happy stuff!<br>****Anyways, you guys are the best! And please leave me a review!  
>My reviews aren't even half the amount of followers I have, and a lot of them are the same people reviewing more than once. Come on guys! Am I really asking too much?<br>Maybe that sounds kinda demanding or bratty... whatever. Please review!  
>Love you guys!<br>**


	11. Chapter 11

**AN: You guys are the best! I got a really good response with reviews, so I wanted to give back by updating as soon as I could!  
><strong>

**Chapter 11**

"It's actually gotten pretty late." Ginny pointed to the large grandfather clock we kept in the den.

"Right, kids. Get in bed."

There was lots of groaning and "Oh mum" and "We're not kids anymore!", but then they were finally off.

Ginny snuggled up closer to me, and took my hands in hers.

"I think tomorrow I'll sit out from the story," she said.

"Alright." I understood what she didn't want to say. Sitting here listening about my past girlfriend's wasn't her favorite way to spend the day. "In fact, I think I'll sit out until you get to the good stuff."

"'Good stuff'? What exactly would that be?" I asked.

"When I come in of course!"

I chuckled. "Alright. But you'll be gone a while."

"That's fine. I'll visit Hannah tomorrow, go shopping the next day. I'll find ways to keep myself busy."

"We will miss you though." I kissed the top of her head.

"No, _you'll_ miss me. The kids won't care."

"Well they're idiots and don't know what's good for them," I said.

Ginny just laughed.

…

So the next morning after breakfast I continued on with the story without Ginny.

...

"I hope I'm not keeping you from your studies," I said to Vivian as I walked her out of her dorm building.

"Oh no." She shook her head. "I could really use the break actually."

"I know what that's like." I agreed. "It's good to get away. Honestly, I haven't been out with a girl since well... This one girl dumped me over a year ago."

"Oh I remember you mentioning that, what happened?" Vivian asked, then thought better. "Sorry, you don't have to talk about it if you don't want to."

"No, I do." I was amazed to find that was true. "I haven't told any one except Hermione, it'd be nice to share."

Vivian gave me a gentle smile. "I'm happy to listen, but let's wait until we're sitting at dinner."

We went to some local restaurant, that wasn't crowded, so we could get our food fast. Once our menus were whisked away, Vivian stopped talking, and put on her listening face. It made me smile, as did most things about her.

"Her name is Ginny." I decided to start there. And so I told her everything, not in great detail, but I covered all the big things. She listened patiently, only making the occasional comment. When it got hard to talk about, she took my hand, and it was like the whole world with all its pains faded away. She was holding my hand, and I didn't want anything else.

"Wow, I'm really sorry Harry," She said sincerely when I finished.

"It's your turn," I replied, finally getting to my food.

"Oh, great." She looked down, biting her lip. "Well, his name is Leo. We met my first semester of college. We dated until the beginning of January, this year. I guess at the time I thought he was the one, but then he dumped me."

"Why?"

"He said he didn't want to date anyone long term." She scoffed rolling her eyes. "But then why did we date for over a year? It's all so stupid."

"Sorry, some guys can be real jerks."

Vivian smiled at me. "What about you?"

"Well I wish I hadn't been such a jerk to Ginny." I admitted. "But, I promise to be better to you."

She looked at me sweetly. "I really believe that."

We spent the evening just talking, and laughing, and it was just her and me. I didn't spare a thought for work, my friends, Ginny, anyone or anything but Vivian.

It was the best night I'd had in over a year, and it made me realize how truly pathetic that was. We were having such a great time that it came as a shock when the waitress came to inform us that the restaurant was closing. Without thinking I took her hand, and we wandered around the midnight streets until the sky began lightening to blue.

"We'd better get to my dorm before my room mate assumes I've been murdered," Vivian said.

"Oh I completely forgot. You don't have a class or something tomorrow...or I guess it's really today now."

She shook her head. "It's Sunday, no one does. But there is a dance tonight, and it'd be nice to go and not pass out."

I chuckled. "Yeah, I could use some sleep myself." We began heading back to her dorm hands clasped.

"You know Harry, I'd really like if you came to the dance tonight," She offered.

"Oh... I'm not so great at dancing."

"Then you'll fit in." She winked. I smiled back.

"Well then, I'd love to go."

Vivian was so tired then that she stopped talking and just put her head against my shoulder. A position I was quite pleased with. When we got back to her dorm house she reminded me that I couldn't go in.

"I had an amazing time," she said at the door. "Definitely the best time in months. Thank you."

"It was a pleasure." I decided to be bold, and just straightforward. "I like you a lot Vivian."

She looked down smiling. "I like you a lot too."

"I don't want to date anyone else." I waited nervously for a reply to that.

She grinned while biting her lip and looking away shyly. "Me neither."

I felt so much joy then, it's amazing I contained my cool.

"Can I pick you up at seven for the dance?"

"I'd love that." She looked back up to my eyes.

Then came that wonderfully awkward and anxious moment when neither of you wants to go, and you really want to kiss her. But it was the first date, and she was backing away.

"Well..." I wanted to say something meaningful, but was completely brain dead. "Sleep well."

She grinned. "You too... See you later."

"Yeah..."

She gave a lingering look before turning to unlock the door. She swung it open, then paused. I stared at her curiously, and was surprised when she abruptly flung around and planted a quick kiss on me before rushing into the building.

I stood there, dazed and blinking rapidly. With a grin, I turned away. I could've quickly apparated to my flat, but instead I felt like skipping down the streets.

...

Before I had time to realize what was happening, I was spending all my time with Vivian.

Just sitting quietly while she studied or going out to watch a show. We did everything, and it felt strange, yet nice to be part of the muggle world again. There, I didn't have to worry about being pestered, or expected to be extraordinary. I could just be me.

With Vivian I never felt pressure, or like I had to do or be anything. I could just be Harry. It was very refreshing.

Even more surprising though, was when I realized I was in love with Vivian.

"Vivian is pretty cool," Ron spoke up one afternoon as we played wizard's chess in our shared office. We often did that on days when there was nothing to do but procrastinate on paperwork.

It was a small room without a window and, although we'd often complain about it, I know that we've both missed it as the years have passed.

Our desks stood on either end piled with bits of parchment and old newspapers. The wall between us was burned because when we were bored we'd sometimes shoot sparks at each other. The rubbish bin was always overflowing, and we kept a bookshelf packed with bottled potions that we had to repair frequently.

"She's great," I agreed. Then I thought to do something I almost never did with Ron: actually talk with him about our feelings. At the time it just felt like too much to keep in. I had to tell someone. "I'm actually in love with her."

He glanced up in surprise, and then quickly went back to the chess board. "Hmm." He continued with his move, and then glanced up at me anxiously. "I'm thinking of asking Hermione to marry me."

"What? ... Are you? ... Brilliant!" I could hardly believe it.

"Yeah." Ron smiled. "I figured it was about time."

"Absolutely," I agreed. "Look at us, both in wonderful relationships."

"Yes, check mate."

…

"I thought Uncle Ron and Aunt Hermione didn't get married until after you and mum," Lily said.

"Well there's a whole other side to that story," I replied.

"Does it include them breaking up and Uncle Ron becoming a pathetic loser afterward?" James asked sarcastically.

"James, shut up."

...

"I'm really happy," I told Hermione one late morning a month later in June as we got cups of tea.

"That's good," She said. "Ron and I really like her, a lot."

"I'm thinking of asking her to move in."

"What?" Hermione was shocked. "Are you serious? Don't you think it's a bit early for that?"

"Well, it's been five months." I thought about it. "And it's not like she doesn't stay over most nights any ways."

"Harry, even Ron and I haven't moved in together yet."

"Well that's you two, and frankly you guys are taking it way too slow."

"Hey!" She protested. "We're trying to be smart about this."

"Right, well you have the right to do that. And I have the right to do what I want," I argued.

"Fine." She looked irritated. "Do what you want. But I'm just saying, rushing things won't help you."

I didn't want to think about what she was saying. Hermione could be annoying like that.

"What about Ginny?" She asked after minutes of silence.

"What about her?" I glared at her. She knew that subject was off limits.

"Well, are you completely over her?"

There she went, pestering me again. "Yes Hermione." I sighed. "Really, I don't even think about her any more."

That wasn't entirely true. Yes, being with Vivian made everything better, but I honestly still thought about Ginny sometimes. I felt bad that I did, but there was still a soft spot for her. Vivian knew this though, and she confessed to still thinking of Leo as well.

Hermione was giving me her skeptical look. "Oh come on Harry, don't lie to me."

"Hermione, leave me alone."

"Fine." She got up, and huffed out of the shop.

**AN: Thanks again to all of you guys that wrote reviews! It was much better than usual, but still a little more would be nice. I really need the reviews to help the story to be better!**

**Any who, please continue to write reviews**!  
><strong>And I want to talk to the Guest reviewer thats apparently my number 1 fan. I really wish I had a name for you or something because i can't even tell which of my guest reviewers is you. But one of them has posted a review for all of my Harry Potter stories. Thank you so much! You actually reminded me of a story, and so I'll try to keep writing it :)<strong>  
><strong>You're the bomb, and I love you!<strong>

**I also want to reply to all my anonymous reviewers here. Not sure if you're the special guest that's my #1 fan or not, but whatever.**

**For the first guest that wrote for chapter 10, "Why I married my stalker"? Haha what? I don't know what you mean**

**For the next guest that actually wrote for chapter 9, yeah that's the scene I was talking about. I love that episode, and that scene is one of my favorites. Cracks me up :)**

**Then the guest that wrote for chapter 10 (same one?) I'm happy that some of this story comes as a surprise, I can never tell how people will take it.**

**And to the most recent anonymous: thank you so much :) Yeah there's definitely a whole other side to this story. Ginny's side. Because she too had to grow up more and learn a few more lessons.  
><strong>

**So the moral of this story is, if you want to review anonymously, couldn't you at least leave something I can call you by so it's less confusing? Haha but really, thanks to my anonymous reviewers!**


	12. Chapter 12

**AN: So I meant to publish this earlier, but I've been procrastinating... A lot. I love writing these chapters, but revising and editing is a pain. It gets pretty tedious reading something for the 50th time.  
>Here's me when I start revising: Ok pulled up the document... I should go read the new articles on cracked... Ok read them now I need to focus on the story... I'll go look at pinterest, just for 5 minutes... hour latter ok now I really need to start editing... I think I'll go get a snack... Alright seriously I need to do this... After reading a paragraph, I think I'll go look at tumblr...<br>So yeah, you get the idea :)  
>But thanks to all my reviewersfollower/readers :)  
><strong>

**Chapter 12**

The very next day after my argument with Hermione, I asked Vivian to move in.

And as with everyone, I soon became annoyed with sharing my place with her. Living with someone is always difficult.

She kicked me in her sleep, left the bathroom a mess, and never did the dishes.

But worst of all, she didn't know I was a wizard, so I was living like a Muggle. You don't realize how much you depend on magic until you can't use it. It became so irritating, I almost caved in a few times.

This all made me think. If we got married, I'd have to live like this for the rest of my life, or else tell her.

How would she take the news? Would she leave me? Get me admitted to an institute? Would she want me to use magic all the time to make our lives easier?

No matter what, I couldn't see it going well.

But I still loved her, so I knew I had to anyways.

One evening I finally got the courage to bring it up to her. We were enjoying dinner when I asked her.

"Vivian, do you believe in magic?"

She chewed slowly, looking me over. "What do you mean?"

"Well magic, you know potions and wands and all that."

"Oh brilliant." She dropped her fork. "Don't tell me your a part of some cult or something."

"What? No! What are you talking about?"

"My uncle Richard joined one of those! They would brew cat liver and spread it on the foreheads!"

"No, Vivian." I sighed. "I'm not talking about a cult."

"Well good." She went back to eating. Then minutes later, set her things down again to look at me directly. "It's just that I still feel like I don't know so many things about you. I've never been to your work."

"I've told you, it's all confidential," I said. "Don't you trust me?"

"Of course I do. But you just seem extra secretive sometimes. It makes one think."

"I'm only protecting you."

"If you say so. But why would you suddenly ask me about magic?"

"I guess I was just curious."

"Well the answer is no." She said bluntly. "I don't believe in magic. I never did." She examined me skeptically. "Do you?"

I sat there staring at her blankly, wondering what on Earth I was supposed to say.

"Um, kinda."

"Well, what difference does it really make?" She went back to eating.

For some reason that really boiled my blood. Maybe it was because I was tired, and so busy with work. Her never washing the dishes also added to it. And why did she have to get up so many times during the night? It always woke me up! And she could eat so loudly. It was driving me crazy!

But most of all, she didn't think it mattered to believe in magic.

How could it _not_ matter?

How could you live your life not at least hoping for a little magic in the world? Was she really so content with a normal Muggle life? How could she be? It was driving me completely crazy.

"The _difference_ is that I want to be with someone that can at least _hope_ for magic!" I burst out.

Vivian caught right on to my mood, and was instantly angry. "Well maybe I don't want to be with a grown man that still holds on to make-believe!"

From there it turned into an all out war. I don't remember much of what we said. It was all very petty really. But we were just both yelling about everything that had become irritating about each other.

And then Vivian threw one of the plates.

When that plate came crashing down, shattering into little bits, scattering across the room silence fell on both of us. We stood there just staring at one another, until Vivian finally spoke.

"I'm going to be sleeping at a friend's house!" And she stormed out of the flat.

I stared at the door, and when she didn't come back, I pulled out my wand to clean up the platter. It was such a relief to use my wand in my own home.

That night I should have gotten more sleep. Vivian wasn't there to kick me. But instead I laid there feeling so lonely I couldn't sleep at all.

…

The next day I met Ron and Hermione for lunch, and told them the whole thing.

"Tough break," Ron said. "I'd recommend flowers."

"That's assuming she wants to come back in the first place," I said.

"Why wouldn't she?" Hermione asked.

"I said some pretty bad things."

"Like what?"

"That she's getting a useless degree."

"Oi!" Ron said.

"Oh Harry." Hermione shook her head.

"I didn't really mean it -although it's true. I was just so mad. About everything."

"Well, I guess this leaves you with a question," Hermione said.

"What's that?"

"Do you want her back?"

"Of course I do," I said.

"Well then," Hermione smiled. "What's stopping you from going right now to get her back?"

I could take a hint. I stood up, and apparated out without a second thought.

…

I found Vivian back at the flat, and the second I saw her I felt so wretchedly awful about everything I had said.

"Vivian, I'm so sorry," I said.

"Me too." She bit her lip, standing only feet away, but it felt like miles. "I shouldn't have said all those things."

"Me neither."

"So, what happens now?" Vivian wondered, leaning against the couch.

"Well I'd like you to come back."

"I'd like that too."

We just stood there staring until I couldn't take it any more. I rushed over to hug her.

"I've missed you so much."

"It's only been a day." She laughed. "But I missed you too."

"Let's never fight again."

"Agreed."

Yeah... That didn't work out.

**AN: Thanks for reading! Please leave a review!**

**To all of you that feel I'm depriving you of Harry/Ginny romance, check out the one-shot I posted last week. _Ten Things I Love About You_. I think it's mushy enough to make up for things.  
><strong>

**Review, review, review and I'll post a new chapter soon. And you should want it to come soon, because the next one is BIG! ;)  
><strong>


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

Work had been a pain on one seemingly regular day. Long stressful hours of filling out paper work, and dealing with impatient and demanding people.

All I wanted was to get home, enjoy a hot meal, and lay back on my sofa. Little did I know what really awaited me.

I stepped through the door, and Vivian was there waiting to jump right into my arms.

I was surprised, but hugged her back. When she pulled away I saw tears in her eyes.

"Vivian are you alright?"

She smiled through the tears. "Everything is fine, great really."

I just stared at her, perplexed. "I... Don't understand."

"Harry," She looked straight at me, I then saw that she was shaking. "I'm pregnant."

…

"WHAT?!" All three of my children shouted at once.

"I can't believe this!" Lilly looked hysterical.

"We. Have. Another. Brother or sister?!" James jumped out of his chair halfway between surprise and anger.

"Why didn't you ever tell us?!" Al demanded.

"Calm down." I said. They didn't make any change. "James, sit. Just keep listening, and you'll understand." That didn't seem to assure them, but at least they were quiet.

…

"I'm pregnant."

The words bounced around my head, until my mind was so far away.

I literally had no thoughts. Dark blankness clouded my mind. It was as if my brain was completely disconnected.

Finally thoughts came, after an eternity.

I'm going to be a father.

I have no idea how to be a father.

At all, whatsoever.

Still, no emotions came. Was I happy? Was I sad?

I felt nothing. Until I felt nothing but complete anxiety.

How on Earth could I be a father?

"Harry?" Vivian's voice brought me back to that flat. I saw that she was looking at me with worry. "Harry, please say something."

When I looked at her, things changed.

The anxiety didn't go away, not even a little. However, when I saw her I felt over come with joy.

This was Vivian. I love her, and we're having a baby, together.

A baby.

I smiled.

It's hard to explain just how happy knowing you'll be a parent makes you. Some day you all will understand.

I pulled her into a warm embrace.

"I..." There were no words in my mind to string together. "I can't believe it." I pulled away.

"Me neither." She smiled, I wiped a tear off her cheek.

"We're having a baby!" I felt like laughing, or better yet running down the street proclaiming my joy. She did laugh a little, before kissing me.

"I know!"

"Well.." I had no idea what to tell her. "We're... How about you marry me?" It just came out.

She gasped, and then smiled. "Really! Do you really mean that?"

"Of course." I didn't know where it came from, but it felt right. "I love you Vivian." I pulled her in for another kiss. "So, will you marry me?"

"Of course!" She exclaimed, kissing me once again.

…

Hours later we were cuddled up on that little sofa so lost in our joy and worries.

"I think we should find a real home, for the baby." Vivian said.

"I have a house." The words came out before I had time to realize how stupid they were.

"You do?" She was surprised.

I'd just realized that she'd never heard of Sirius. She had no clue I'd inherited his manor and small family fortune.

"I got it from my god father, when he died." I decided to explain things to her. But could she go to a home like that? She wouldn't be able to see it, or understand it at all. I shouldn't have brought it up, but it was too late.

"You had a godfather? Why didn't you ever tell me?"

"I uh... Must've slipped my mind."

"You forgot that you inherited a house?" She turned to give me skeptical look. I gave her a weak smile, and she turned away. "Any other things I should know about?"

Well, I'm a wizard, first of all. And our child will likely be magical too.

Oh Hell. I'd forgotten that too.

That was my chance to tell her, to come clean. I have no idea what might have happened if I did. But I took the cowardly way out.

"Well..." I thought it through. "Not that I can think of, you?"

"No." She let out a long sigh. "Well, I'd like to see this house of yours."

"Oh, I don't know if that's a good idea..."

"You expect me to move into a house I've never seen?"

"No, I never said we should move there."

"Why shouldn't we? It'd save us a lot of time and money."

"It's a bit of a wreck right now." And what about Kreacher? He was attached to Grimauld place. None of that really mattered though, Vivian couldn't get into the place any how. I wondered if there was a way to remove all the spells and make it visible to muggles. But even if there was would I want to live there? It had never seemed like home, even with Sirius there. But since I'd brought it up, she'd insist on seeing it no matter what.

"Well we can clear it up." Vivian turned back around so she could look me in the eye. "Why don't you want me there?" I saw how much this hurt her.

"Well..." I wanted to tell her the truth, but how could I? So I decide to tell her about Sirius, as much as I could anyways. I told her about his family life, that they were racist and kicked him out. How he hated that house, and I didn't like it much either. I explained that Sirius had given me everything, including the house, but I didn't really want it. "I can't imagine raising our children there." I concluded. "It just makes me sad."

Vivian's eyes had turned tender. "Aww, I'm sorry. I didn't realize you felt that way. You must have really loved this Sirius. Why didn't you ever tell me about him before?"

"I don't like to talk about it." I shrugged. "He was murdered."

Vivian gasped. "That's terrible!"

"It's alright, we caught her." I felt good about that at least.

We didn't talk again for a while, I think Vivian didn't want to press me to tell more. But eventually she piped up.

"Uh, Harry?"

"Yes?" I braced myself for a difficult question. She surprised me.

"You said 'our children', I don't think we're having twins." She said.

"Oh, well I meant when we have more children latter."

"Oh." Her tone was another surprise. "You want more children?"

"Well, yes. I guess I've always imagined having at least east two kids."

"Oh." The same tone again. "I only want one."

"Oh." Now I had that tone. We'd never really talked about children, at all. But I'd always assumed she liked kids, that she'd want a couple or more.

"It's just, I was an only child. You too, I guessed you'd want it that way too." She said.

"Well I wasn't really raised like an only child, I lived with my cousin."

"Oh yes, but that wasn't pleasant was it? We can avoid that by just having one child, that way they won't fight over favoritism."

I was becoming irritated. "We can avoid the way I was raised by not being terrible people."

"You know what I mean."

"How do you think we should raise our child?" I was beginning to worry.

"Well we'll just give her all our love, and try our very best."

"Her? Who said it was a girl?"

"That's just my guess." She shrugged.

"Well, alright."

"Harry, what do you think we should name her, or him?"

"I honestly hadn't thought about it. You have any ideas?"

"I've always wanted a daughter named Lizzie, do you like it?"

"Yeah, that sounds nice."

"You can pick her middle name."

"Oh. Could that be Lilly? After my mother."

"Of course. Elizabeth Lillian Potter. How pretty."

"But what if it's a boy?"

"We could name him Sirius, from what you've told me he sounded like an excellent god father."

"I like it. Speaking of godfathers, would it be alright if Ron is the kid's godfather?"

"Of course!"

"I love you." I kissed the top of her head, then placed a hand to her stomach. "And our little mystery in there too."

She laughed, putting her hand over mine. "And I love you."

**AN: Please, _please_, PLEASE! Leave me a review :) It's the only payment I get! **


	14. Chapter 14

**AN: HAPPY ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY!**

**Exactly a year ago today I posted the very first chapter for this story. And I just have to thank you all so much for all the support that all of you have given. I didn't expect so many people to like this idea (it is a bit off, even I know it), but so many of you have followed, favorited, reviewed, or just read :) More on this later, for now go ahead and read, and I'm sure most of you will like what happens :) **

****Chapte******r 14**

"And you were ready to start a family with this women?" James asked. He and my other to children held expressions of distaste and confusion.

"No. Not really. Even as I sat there talking with her about our future, I felt out of place. It just didn't feel right. But thankfully things worked out."

...

"Well, you're not pregnant." The muggle doctor told us just days later as we sat in his bright office.

Vivian and I turned to each other in alarm.

"What... But.. Are you sure?" Vivian asked.

"Absolutely." The doctor said. He began to give a medical explanation that I'm sure you kids wouldn't care to hear.

I sat there completely stunned, not knowing what to think. But then I felt great relief wash over me.

All the obligations and duties tying me to Vivian floated away, and I felt nothing but alleviation.

When the doctor was finished, we dismissed ourselves silently. And went home without a word.

I wasn't quite sure what to do next, but I thought I'd wait on Vivian.

…

"Thank Merlin she wasn't really pregnant!" Lilly burst in, looking so relieved. Her brothers too.

"Yes." I agreed. "Having a kid with Vivian wouldn't have gone well."

"So did you dump her next or what?" James asked.

"You'll have to wait and see."

…

Days passed without us really speaking. Sure we'd talk a little. We'd say hello, ask how our days went. Things like that, but we didn't talk about anything really important.

I began to feel very lonely. It was like Vivian wasn't really there any more, I might as well have been alone.

Finally one evening she was waiting for me on the couch.

"Harry, lets talk."

I came over to sit by her. I could see by her red eyes, and slightly streaked cheeks that she'd been crying.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"Harry...This whole pregnancy thing has made me think. About a lot of things. Like are we still engaged?"

I'd completely forgotten about that. "Uh..."

She made a face. "You only asked me because of the baby."

I couldn't say anything, because it was true. Until I'd thought she was pregnant, I hadn't planned on proposing to.

"When I found out I wasn't pregnant..." She continued. "At first I was really disappointed. But now I just feel relief. I'm not ready. _We_ aren't ready."

I still said nothing. Everything she was saying was true. I knew it was.

"I'm only nineteen! I still haven't really figured out what I want to do with myself. But also..." She took my hands and looked at me deep in the eyes. "I love you... But I don't think you're _it_ for me."

"What, what do you mean?" I asked.

"When I think of my life... You just aren't the guy I want to spend it with. I'm too young to be making that choice now. And all those things we fought about a couple weeks ago, they're still true. They didn't just go away." Her voice was filling with tears she was suppressing. But she laughed a little through them. "I mean we've been acting so adult, and it's been fun. But it just wasn't real. We aren't _really _adults yet. I just wanted to feel like one. I guess this has been a reality check for me."

"What are you really saying?" I asked.

"I'm leaving Harry. We're over.

"I want to grow up." She continued. "And then I want to be with someone that will come home and really tell me about what he did at work. I want to be with someone where I feel like I know all about their past." She stood up. "This just isn't _it_ for me. And I don't think it's _it_ for you either."

I made no attempt to stop her. Instead I just sat there as she got her things and walked out of the door, never to return.

…

"So she dumped you." James laughed.

"Did all muggles talk that strangely?" Al asked.

"I don't think so."

"What happened to Vivian after that?" Lilly wondered.

"Well I didn't see her again for a long time. Al was already born before I saw her again. I ran into her at a restaurant. She was married and had a daughter."

"It must've been weird seeing her again." Lilly made a face.

"A little. But it had been so long, and I'd moved so far past being with her." I shrugged.

"So did you finally get back with Mum after that?" Lilly asked.

"You'll see..."

**AN: So Vivian is finally gone HALLELUJAH! **

**I really just have to thank all of you so much. And I'm sorry that this story has lasted so long, hopefully I'll finish it before the two year anniversary. **

**Thanks to all of the people that have sent me reviews. I expected to get a lot of hate after the last chapter, but the positive reviews for it were significantly more than the negative. And even the people that criticized my decisions were really nice about it. I guess it just proves how awesome this fandom is :D **

**I have to personally thank my awesome beta: triniroo. I contacted her around chapter 4 I think, and she has stuck with me ever since. Thank you so much, I can honestly say that I've become a better writer thanks to your guidance. **

**And to my kinda recent friend ****babybutterflyjam. Thanks for letting me bounce ideas off of you :)**

**I never thought I'd get more than 40 reviews (if even that many) but there are currently 92. Wow! Thank you guys so much for that! To give back, I'd love to reward the 100****th**** reviewer. **

**To whomever sends the 100****th**** review, I will write a one-shot about your topic of choice, or I'll name a character after you for this ff, or both! Just whoever writes the 100****th**** review I'll message you and you can make the demands. I'll do whatever you want :) **

**So get reviewing people! **


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

"And then she just left." I recounted the story to Ron and Hermione the next day at my flat over dinner.

"Wow. So what are you going to do?" Ron asked.

"Nothing. We're completely done now."

"What's different this time?" Hermione asked.

"I don't know. I guess just that everything she said was true."

"Well I'm really sorry." Hermione said.

"Don't be." I summoned over a cup with a grin. "It's been so great doing stuff like that again."

Hermione looked at me strangely.

"Could we talk about something else?" I sighed.

"Well actually, there's something I wanted to tell you." Hermione perked up. "I'm going to America."

"What?"

"Well it will be a work trip. I'll be there for a few months helping a case study for hippogriff rights. It's a great opportunity."

"Thats great. Congratulations!" I gave her a hug, and saw over her shoulder the fierce grimace Ron had.

"Thank you." Hermione beamed. "It'll be interesting being in a new country, all by myself. Too bad Ron can't come." She frowned at him slightly. "But I shouldn't be gone more than three months."

She was actually gone for eight.

"Well it sounds fantastic. To Hermione's new opportunity." I raised my glass.

Ron raised his grudgingly.

"But are you sure you'll be alright with me gone?" Hermione asked, suddenly worried. "I mean you're going through a break up, and I leave in a week."

"I'll be fine Hermione, you're not my mother." I sighed.

"Right."

"Besides, I'm actually happy about this." I smiled. Hermione studied me skeptically, obviously not buying it.

But I acted enthusiastic all night. We shared a nice meal and enjoyed each other's company.

It was only once they were gone that I sat in the dead silence of my flat. Very much alone.

…

Hermione rushed around the room, muttering a checklist to herself, and levitating items either into her deceptively small suitcase, or various boxes littering her floor.

"Are you sure I can't help?" I asked, feeling useless just watching her pack for her trip.

"Yes, only I know where everything belongs." Hermione insisted.

Ron peered around the corner. "I put your books away, what else can I do?"

"Would you wait for my Dad outside? He should be here any moment and always forgets which building I'm in."

Ron nodded, and went out the front door. Once he was gone with the door shut securely behind him, Hermione turned to me. "Harry I know you're more miserable than letting on."

I sighed heavily.

"Don't try to deny it. You know it is okay to be upset. I just want you to take care of yourself, alright?"

"And I am, leave it alone." I said.

Hermione looked at me sadly. "Have you seen her at all since she left?"

"No. And I don't see how I would, really. She's living at her school again. I no longer have any reason to go there."

"What about Ginny?"

I tensed up. "What about her?"

"Well have you talked to her at all?"

"Ending it with Vivian hasn't changed anything there."

"But it could..."

"No. That's over."

Hermione gave me a skeptical look.

"I mean it Hermione. She's moved on, I've moved on. There's nothing more."

"Do you _want _it that way?"

I thought about that. Really pondered it over.

If by some miraculous chance Ginny wanted to get back together with me, would I want to get back together with her? I'd be lying if I said no.

I looked back at Hermione, she was waiting for a response. I opened my mouth to answer, but was unsure what to say. Thankfully, Ron came through the door with Hermione's parents just then, so we cut the conversation short.

...

Hours after Hermione had left for America, Uncle Ron and I found ourselves at the Leaky Cauldron with Neville.

"So here we are again, three guys all alone." Ron sighed.

"_You_ have a girlfriend." I pointed out.

"She's in America, so it really doesn't count."

I just shook my head along with Neville.

"So what have you found to do with all your new free time?" Neville asked both of us.

"I've been visiting Teddy a lot more often." I answered. "Can you believe he's two years old?"

"Wow, is he talking already?"

"He has been for months."

"He calls me 'Raw'." Ron added. Neville chuckled. "At least it's not as bad as what he calls Hermione. Even I can't say it."

"It's something like 'Harionie'. I dunno, it seems to change every day." I laughed.

"And what does he call you?" Neville looked at me.

"'Har-rie'. It's close enough. Yesterday when I was over there, he had purple hair and my green eyes. It was quite a sight."

"George is hoping that he'll be a red-head for the wedding so he can pass as a cousin or something." Ron said.

"Have he and Angelina set a date yet?" I asked.

"I think they said December, that way Ginny will be on break from Quidditch, and Charlie will be home too." Ron said.

I hadn't been to a full Weasley gathering since Uncle Percy's wedding. Of course I'd visit your grandparents, and seen most of the uncles, but I'd been avoiding the full family.

But I knew I'd have to go to that wedding, and I wanted to anyways.

"Will Hermione be back by then?" Neville asked.

"She should be back by November, so yeah. In the mean time I'm avoiding the Burrow. Mum is in full wedding planning mode. George keeps insisting that they keep it simple, but Mum won't listen. If he had it his way, him he and Angelina would've eloped by now."

"You all ready for another round?" The bar maid came over and asked us.

"We're fine."

She looked pointedly at Neville with her big brown eyes. "Do you need anything else?"

"Uh." He was slightly taken aback. "No, I think I'm good."

"Just let me know." She raised her eyebrow, and walked off flipping her blonde hair. Ron and I exchanged a look, before turning on Neville.

"What?"

"That girl is was flirting with you." Ron whispered.

"Oh no," Neville shook his head. "She just wants a big tip."

"No really, I think she likes you."

"You really think so?"

"Yes!"

Neville peered over to see her at the bar. She noticed him looking and waved. "I'll be right back." He got up, and went over to her.

"Good for Neville." I said. Ron drank to that. I watched Neville talking to that girl, and hoped things would work out.

They didn't of course, not with that random girl any ways. But as I sat there talking casually with your uncle Ron, I hoped Neville would be happy. Ron too.

I hoped that something good was waiting for me.

…

"Please tell me you got back with mum next." James said.

I laughed. "Not quite yet." They groaned. "But I know what'll cheer you up. I'll skip ahead to Uncle George's wedding. That turned into a pretty crazy night."

**AN: Please leave me a review! The story will get more exciting soon, I promise**


	16. Chapter 16

**AN: Sorry it took so long to update this, somehow all my ff email alerts were getting sent to my spam so it took me a while to figure out that my beta had sent me the edited docx of this chapter.  
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**Chapter 16**

"America was great!" Hermione was telling us at Uncle George's wedding. She'd arrived just hours before the ceremony. Now it was over, and we sat at a table surrounded by dancing couples. "We've all been working so hard and having so much fun." She went into more details, but I wasn't listening.

I was watching all the people around us. George and Angelina were so happy. Bill and Fleur were caring for little Victoire. Percy and Audrey were twirling around smiling. I tried not to notice your mother dancing with one of George's friends.

"Harry. Harry! Are you listening?" Hermione got my attention.

"Hmm yes, America was great."

Hermione sighed. "I was trying to tell you about one of my colleagues, Rehtaeh."

"'Rehtaeh', what sort of name is that?" I asked.

"It's Heather backwards," Hermione explained. Ron and I exchanged a look, before looking back at Hermione in distaste. "She's American, alright?"

"Oh." That explained it.

"Any ways, she's really nice. I think you'd like her."

"Oh great, now you're trying to set me up? No thanks." I shook my head.

"Fine. Be like that." Hermione crossed her arms.

"I'd better go dance with my new sister," Ron said, getting up.

"So you seem to be doing really good," Hermione said.

"Yeah I am. I've been keeping busy with work, and Teddy."

"Thats good. And you've been keeping an eye on Ron for me?"

"Yes." I rolled my eyes.

A moment later a small boy that couldn't have been older than seven came over to Hermione.

"Would you dance with me?" He asked her, reaching for her hand.

She smiled. "Of course." They went over to the floor, awkwardly swaying.

I chuckled at how silly they looked. Then I noticed you mother dancing and with Angelina's cousin. I looked away and began tearing little bits of my napkin.

Hermione was back soon but only sat down for a second before gasping in horror. "What is he doing?"

I followed her gaze and saw Teddy across the room by the cake. His trainers were off, right next to his dress coat, and he was in the middle of taking off his shirt. Mrs. Tonkswas a few feet away with her back turned engaged in a conversation.

Hermione and I rushed over just as he was discarding his shirt and pulling at his belt.

"Teddy, what are you doing?" I asked, trying to stop him.

"It's hot!" He pouted, pushing my hands away.

"You need to stop." Hermione ordered, picking up his clothes. "Come on, put these back on."

"No!" Teddy protested. "I won't!" His voice was getting louder and people were starting to notice.

"Please Teddy, I can put a cooling charm on you," Hermione offered, getting out her wand.

"No. I hate clothes!" He continued to fight to get his belt off. The dancers nearby stopped to look at the spectacle and began chuckling.

"Teddy, shh." I tried to quiet him, but he only got louder.

"I hate clothes! I want cake!"

Finally his grandmother noticed and came over.

"Only good quiet boys that keep their clothes on get cake." Hermione said.

I couldn't hold in my laughter anymore, I tried to hide it behind coughs.

"Teddy, what's going on?" His grandmother demanded.

"I don't wanna wear clothes!"

George and Angelina had come over now and started laughing. Teddy noticed and beamed proudly at them, standing up tall to showcase his bare chest.

"Teddy, you have to put your clothes back on." His grandmother said.

"But I don't waaant to! I waaaant cake!"

Mrs. Tonks turned to the bride and groom. "I'm so sorry about this." She picked up her grandson as he thrashed and screamed in protest. He grabbed hold of the table cloth behind her back and, as she pulled him away, he dragged the tablecloth with them.

Before any of us could do anything to stop it, the cake and all the platters were dragged right onto the floor. The cake landed with a splat, becoming flat and sending the gold frosting into the air. All of us lucky enough to be in the front got blots of it all over our dress robes.

Everyone turned to the bride and groom as they came to look at their ruined cake. They stared, then turned to each other and began laughing. I joined in and soon everyone was laughing hysterically. Angelina leaned over, and picked up some cake with her hand. She turned to George grinning.

"Here you go." She threw the piece right at him. She still had her superb Quidditch aim. It hit him right between his eyes, exploding into a mushy mask all over his face.

He wiped his face and declared "This means war!" He filled both his hands with a glob of cake.

"No!" Angelina laughed. She pulled me in front of her using me as a shield.

"You think that would stop me?" George said. Before I could do anything the cake was covering my face too.

I cleaned my glasses, then got a handful of the mess, and threw it right at his face. He Ducked, and it instead hit Percy, who was right behind him. Percy's shocked expression had us all laughing.

"Are you just gonna take this?" Audrey asked him as he just stood there in surprise. He made no response, so Audrey came over and attempted to throw some cake at me. Her throw was pretty good, but I dodged and it got Ron in the stomach instead.

Ron looked all the men surrounding him, and yelled. "Attack!"

And from there it became a full on food fight.

Cake was thrown from side to side, a couple tables were knocked over, and some people even started rubbing the frosting in each other's hair.

All the older folk went outside to avoid it, except for your grandmother. She stood at the rear, wand raised ordering us to stop. Next to her stood the photographer, gleefully taking pictures every second.

Eventually it died down. We did run out of cake. It was all smeared over our nice clothes and into the floor. We stood around covered in frosting, laughing and wondering what we were supposed to do now.

"To the garden!" George yelled. He took Angelina by the hand, and they slid out of the room.

We followed them outside, trying not to trip and slide through the mess.

In the yard garden George was sending fireworks off into the sky. Everyone soon joined in. Hundreds of sparklers shot into the black night, lighting up in neon colors.

The bride and groom shared a final kiss before disappearing into the night under the bursts of color.

…

"We've heard that story plenty of times before," James pointed out.

"It's still funny." Al and Lilly were laughing.

"But I've never told you what happened _after_ George and Angelina left. It's not as amusing, but it is important to the story of your mother and me."

…

After the newlyweds had departed, we all cleaned up ourselves up and the huge mess in the reception hall. Everyone was laughing and having a really great time. I was so busy cleaning up that I wasn't watching myself and bumped right into someone.

"Sorry," I told them, and then I saw it was none other than your mother.

"It's alright," she said, smiling at me a little. "You've still got icing in your hair," she pointed out.

"Oh." I quickly cleaned it off with my wand. "Thanks."

We stood there just looking at each other for a moment. I was unwilling to leave, yet unsure what to say. Thankfully she spoke first.

"Well, uh... How have you been?" She seemed unsure what else to say, but I could see at the same time that she was truly curious for my answer.

"I've been pretty good. What about you?" I'd been told very little about what was going on with her at the time.

"Great. I'm loving Ireland."

"Oh yes, I heard you got on to a Quidditch team there."

"Yes, I got very lucky," she said. "I'm one of the chasers, but it's a very minor team there. I do hope to move on."

"Hmm, good luck."

She smiled at me a little. "Harry, I'd hoped that we could maybe..." She trailed off, looking away. Then turned back and held up a hand. "Could we be friends?"

"Friends?"

"Yes." She looked me straight in the eyes. "I know we have a lot of past, but I've tried to move on, and I hoped we could at least be on friendly terms."

I looked down at her, into her brown eyes.

Could I be friends with her? Could I ever _just_ be friends with her?

But then I thought of the alternate option.

Could I endure another two years like these?

"Of course we can," I agreed smiling at her sincerely for the first time in years.

"Great." She beamed at me. "Well I'd actually better go now..." She looked around. "But it was good to see you."

"You too." And as I watched her walk away I wondered at what had just occurred.

**AN: Thanks for reading. I've got to be honest, I've basically lost all interest in this story. Just updating for you guys. So please send me a review so I know I'm not wasting my time. I'm seriously considering just dropping the whole thing.**

**Happy holidays!  
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	17. an update

**I posted this message on my profile almost two months ago and have since received many reviews asking me if I'll update my stories soon, so I'm putting it here too to make sure everyone gets the message**

_As of now the account is frozen indefinitely. I will not be updating any of my stories or posting any thing new. Perhaps ever again. I debated just deleting the account, but thought I'd keep it for anyone that may want to read what I've posted or message me for any reason._

_I'm going on a mission for my church to Brazil in October and wont be coming back for 18 months. While on my mission I wont have any access to computers, so don't expect any responses after October 30th._

_I may come back to this site once I return in the spring of 2015, but it's not likely._

_I want to say thank you to all of my loyal readers. Thank you for your helpful, encouraging reviews and messages. Thank you for feeling so passionately about fiction. I hope one day to write books that readers feel so much love for._

_Best of luck to all of you!_


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